judeparish » Heh, you know Bunny and I will never see eye-to-eye on the functions of Destiny and it's actions. And Svenge, you think some of the stuff that happened after you came were bad...look what I brought with me. Heiny becoming a shifter (werewolf, in this case), the Baron turning out to be a very nasty necromancer, the darker side of DZ. Daniel's first break down and subsequent meeting with the Tuskers. And then the little stuff like the Salt Pillar Valkrye. If I weren't a spirit mage, I'd almost think this place had been taken over by a malignant fateweaver. But I will say the ley lines in the area are not flowing quite right. And when those lines are funky, strange things can happen, although usually not on this scale. Back to my searches... Shadow is almost convinced she heard some under-standable speech in the sewers admist all the thumping and grinding.

7.27.05 . . .

Lexie » *lifts herself over the edge of the tub, sinks in blissfully*  Ahhhhhh! I need this. Rehearsals are so demanding.  *feels the tension leave her muscles, drifts off to sleep; dreams of Vinnie and Izzie's brilliance; Bill and Edna May in their solemn butoh; things have solidity in her dreams...none of that troublesome molecular business...
ijsbeers drift through her dream; Ah, yes...her next project will feature an Ijsbeer ballet! Perhaps an interpretive ballet about the recent Ijsbeer battles*

Edna May » Speaking of plays, I spoke to Lexie just last night about Porcupine Love Song. Rehearsals have taken a bit longer on this one—classic art's always a challenge—but she said it' s coming along nicely and shall see bliss anon. Bill Shatner and I have been working feverishly on our Butoh solo...that is, when I wasn't practicing my kill techniques in the death arena. And Vinnie and Izzie are...well, just heaven on the boards. I get quite...
worked up...just watching them together.  *quivers, flushes, eyes Daniel's new loufah; smiles and watches the sun dip beneath the Sound*

Edna May » *joins Daniel in the hot tub, calls out to Svenge*  The Ijsbeer are some of my favoite residents, Svenge! No one dare say anything against them or they'll feel my wrath!  *rests her head against Daniel's shoulder, sips a Bass Ale, watches the sunset*  Besides, dear, it's summer and Marysville is running in low gear. Things will pick up. Trust me on this.

Svenge Ijsbeer » You know...I have to wonder if we're doing Marysville any good. Since we showed up things just haven't been the same. There used to be plays...and dancing...and now there's alien invasions and thermo-nuclear explosions. I haven't seen Enzo...or Isabella...or Lexie...any of the exciting people that used to come here before we showed up. Ah well.  *looks into his bottle*  Not much left. I think I need a refill.  *heads back to the bar; mutters over his shoulder*  'Night, Marysville. Hope things look better in the morning.

Svenge Ijsbeer » Hah! lightweight!  *eyes the bushes*  Well, ladies...I think you could use a bit of a drink, eh?  *saunters over to the bushes, relieves himself*
Ahhhhhh, I needed that.  *scratches his butt*  Well.

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *runs in, flames singing his fur; jumps in the hottub*  Ahhhhhh. Note to self: alcohol and fires do NOT mix. This body is really taking some getting used to. Not that I was starting a fire. Because...I wasn't. That was all programmed in. Really.  *coughs; pulls a Bass Ale out of his fur*  Fascinating thing, that. I seem to be able to produce one of these things whenever I desire.  *drinks deeply, rests his head on the side of the tub and falls asleep*

Edna May » *nods, runs for tea, special ingredient and IVs; grabs Rev Jim's bong for good measure*

Jude » *ding, ding...rings bell*  JudeP, Bunny... *split-points to separate corners of the ring*  Now, together...
breathe with me, and find your happy place... *whispers
to Edna May*  Quick! Chamomile tea for everyone!

judeparish » Holier than thou? That's a bit much Bunny. I just know how dangerous it is to leave some items lying about. Safe haven or not, this place doesn't need more strangeness.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *pops back in*  Oh, my dear Mr. Parrish, you wouldn't know civil if it bit you on the buttocks. I merely find a "holier than thou" attitude rather tedious. Believe me, my dear man, I have been gracious with you, indeed. Oh my! You don't know how gracious!  *gooses JudeP, giggles, pops back out*

judeparish » Thank the spirits that Bunny will be gone for a bit. Maybe Ernie will at least be civil about my concerns.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *corrects spelling*  That would be Jude. Oh dear, oh dear. Tourettes. London Bridge is falling...I see London I see France, I see someone's underpants! Fee Fie foe fum, I smell the cow jumped over the mary mary quite contrary how does your peter peter pumkin eater had a mares eat oats and goats eat oats and little lambs eat ivy.  *spins into the air and off*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *posts note on hot tub bulletin board*  Dear June, Edna and all interested parties:  Chinatown is requiring my attention of late. But rest assured I shall pop in from time to time, and eventually come to rest in my beloved DunkelZaubern. Menawhile, the shop continues under Ernie's protection, Floyd's unflinching gaze, Dink's care and the Rev's visions.
A safe haven in troubled Marysville.

7.26.05 . . .

chaos » HAHAHAHAH....RAD

7.25.05 . . .

judeparish » That's a good thing, Jude...means it's probably an ET of some kind, meaning it's not my problem

Jude » *nods at JudeP*  And it apparently does not like Ijsbeer...I noticed its veil/spell crumbled at Daniel's touch. Interesting.

judeparish » Wolf, it get's stranger if you check the related blogs.  *wanders off wondering why someone/something was keeping Edna from finding Dan, and why she ignored the helper spirit he sent to her*

Wolf » interesting page

the dark one » *hisses*  ~ ijsssbeerssssss!  *allows the two their moment*  ~ mmmine sssshall commme ssssoon ennough ~  *licks teeth, hisses softly, fades into background*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *scratches off into the distance*

Edna May » *stops long enough to hug him fiercely, glances at his amazing loufah, exits running; heard offstage*  Millicent's butt...that'd work!!!!

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Yes! It'll have to be something large. Something...massive. How about Millicent's behind?  *laughs*

Edna May » Afterwards we'll go blow up something!

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Yes, let's go. This is driving me nuts.  *scratches*

Edna May » Oh yes...definitely together!  *grabs his paw and sprints for the duplex* ...can't tell you how much I've missed you!

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *pulls a portion of his fur aside*  And check out this LOUFAH!

Edna May » Larger... *eyes his nether regions* ...indeed!  *smiles, scratches her neck*  I think I'll be taking that bath with you, if it's okay...  *scratches again*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » It's going to take quite a bit of getting used to. I'm much larger than I used to be.

Edna May » Come with me to the duplex; I've got some terrific flea soap. Used it on Heiny once. Good stuff.  *scratches an itch, grins*  This is...wonderful! Better than wonderful! Although I do miss your other beautiful body. Still...this one is quite marvelous!

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Yes, it's quite fascinating...except for these accursed little buggers.  *falls to the ground and begins furiously scratching himself*

Edna May » You're.......alive! *smiles, thinking about the possibilities*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Careful, Edna...you'll catch them.  *scratches himself*

Edna May » *peers into the ijsbeer's eyes*  Daniel!  *recognizes him, throws her arms around him*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Oh yes...Svenge, Asbörn, and Ernie somehow rendered me motionless, ripped out my personality chip, and transferred it into this comatose Ijsbeer. Then blew up my robotic body.

Edna May » What happened?!! Who was that?  *blinks* ...is that you?  *blink blink*  Fleas?

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Oh, yeah. Um...It's going to be quite an explanation. I've...I've got fleas.

Edna May » DANIEL!! ......Daniel???  *blinks in confusion as she stares at the huge, but gorgeous, ijsbeer*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *sees Edna, pulls off the dark veil*  Howdy!

Edna May » WTF?!!! *squints through darkness*  Daniel???

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Edna?!?

the dark one » *hisses*  ~ nnnot sssso fassst, litttle onne! ~  *casts a dark veil over Edna May, trapping her; cackles*

Edna May » *whirls around, swats at blue lightning bug; listens intently*  Daniel???  *runs toward voice*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Edna! Dammit, I'm sure I saw her...and I think I've got fleas. I must not be used to this body yet.  *scratches himself; wanders off, looking for Edna and perhaps a flea collar*

Edna May » *swats at blue lightning bug*  Beat it! I've got to find Daniel! Whoever has him is going to pay for it in blood!  *slices the air with her chakram, growls; wonders why she wants to follow the bug, fights the urge*  If you want to foster future little baby bugs, shoo!  *snarls*

. . . . .

Jude » *arches eyebrow*  Two indeed.  *frowns*  I'm with you, Svenge. A drink is definitely in order. Man I hate snakes! ...the reptilian kind, that is.  *exits to the bar & grill*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *continues furtively searching for Edna*  I know she must be around here somewhere...I can smell her.  *runs off*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Hmm...two malevolent forces? I need a drink.

Shadow » *head snaps up, ears twitch*  A cold feeling...not the creatures in the sewers. I sense a sibilant voice laughing, watching our every move, and planning something...must tell my master!  *scene fades with Shadow sending a telepathic summons to JP*  Get back inside the wards quickly...we must talk in private. Something else has come up!

7.24.05 . . .

the dark one » *malevolent eyes smolder*  ~ rrrrich hunnnting grrrround ~ we sssssshall sssstay awhilllle ~  *licks lips, mouth curves in slow smile, fades back into darkness*

judeparish » *pops back in suddenly*  Um, I know Daniel was the gun, but haven't we forgotten about the triggerman? Where is Hothgar in all this mess?

judeparish » *catches Edna's voice on the wind while checking DZ and the bar for info*  Edna? Where are you Edna?  *mumbles a few words under his breath, a small blue light appears in front of him*  Go find Enda and bring her home. I know you can't speak, but transmit the feeling that all is well now so she feels at peace following you.  *the blue light dances off in the direction of Edna's voice*  Can't waste the time or energy right now to summon a more complex helper spirit. Must finish my research.  *exits for the night*

Edna May » *voice carries faintly on the night wind*  Daaaannniellll.......where are yoooouuu.....

Jude » *grins at Daniel's disappearing gorgeous rear*  Good to have you back, love. Yes...go find Edna! I think she's going to love the new you.  *exits whistling, and wondering what Shardborn is up to*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Well. If this doesn't just beat all. I'm....a giant space polar bear. A LIVE giant space polar bear. I feel like Pinocchio. Oh, Edna May is going to have a fit... *sniffs the air* This is an interesting tracking method. Nose. No bloody radar.  *sighs*  Maybe Edna will blow something up with me.  *attempts to follow her scent; lopes off*

. . . . .

Jude » *enters, removes notice from hot tub bulletin board; posts new notice*

ATTENTION ALL:  Edna May is still MIA. If anyone has seen or heard from her, please contact me ASAP. Thanks, Jude

*whistles happily as she returns to Svenge's to celebrate Daniel's return*

. . . [ return to reflux ] . . .

Jude » *grins at Ernie*  Gotta love those tiny laptop keyboards.  *voices fade*

Ernie » *uh, that would be me*

EB » *leaps into Dink's pocket to join the party*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *exits*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *exits into bar & grill*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » Curious.

Jude » You've got it, Dink! Lead on!  *exits with Daniel, Svenge, et al*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Sounds good to me! Dink, Ernie, shall we?

Dink B » And sundaes. Let's have a few sundaes too!  *moonwalks to the bar & grill area*

Ernie » *winks at Caiaphas*

Jude » That's your heart, love. You're alive.  *marks the day as Daniel's re-birthday*  Come on, sweet thing...let's go have a few brews.  *grins happily*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » ...And I have this strange beating in my chest.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Bravo!  *claps hands, spins on velvet slippers*

Jude » *hugs him again*  It's okay, Daniel...I'm so glad you're back!  *cocks head*  What're you missing, sweetie?You're looking mighty good to me...

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » I had the strangest dream.  *looks at his hands*  I'm missing something.

Dink B » *leaps into air, punches it with his fist*  Yeah!!!

Ernie » *runs back in when he hears the spluttters*

Jude » DANIEL!!!!  *hugs him fiercely*

Caiaphas J. Ijsbeer » *splutters*

Dink B » *waits to see Daniel too*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *holds his breath; peers closely at Daniel/Jorgen*

Svenge Ijsbeer » We'll know in a second!  *opens Jorgen's mouth, pours Bass Ale into his throat...nothing happens*

Jude » Do it, please, whatever it is, Svenge. The suspense is killing me. I need to see Daniel before I can leave.

Svenge Ijsbeer » There's only one sure-fire way to awaken a sleeping Ijsbeer....

Jude » What do you think, Svenge? Is he in there? Daniel, I mean?

Ernie » *pats Jorgen/Daniel; runs off for beer*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Hmm.

Jude » *watches Jorgen carefully, holding breath again*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » Well, now we wait. Hopefully the combination of technology and magic worked. You all can stay here if you want....I'm going to go get drunker.  *exits*

Jude » *peers at Jorgen intently* ....Daniel?

Ernie » *all is still; the Isbeer glows softly golden*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *picks up a smoking, twisted piece of metal*  There it is.

Jude » *realizes she's been holding her breath...exhales slowly*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » Hmm...it shouldn't be inside... *searches underneath the table*

Ernie » *the spinning slows and stops; the Ijsbeer comes to rest, the chip unseen, now safely inside the ijsbeer*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » It's working! Just a few more seconds! ....... Now! stop!

Ernie » *the two spin in ever changing colors; all is a blur*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *watches as Ernie's light holds the power where it's supposed to be, without destroying the building*

Jude » *envisions Daniel's beautiful body, sighs sadly*

Ernie » *casts glowing protective light around Jorgen and the chip; levitates both*

Dink B » *whispers*  Do it, Ernie!

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *throws the final switch, looks at the mouse*  NOW, ERNIE!

Jude » *hangs onto Svenge while watching raptly*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Whee!

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *the entire building begins to shake*

Ernie » *admires Asbjorn's facility for light-play—much like his own*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *pushes a bunch of buttons; lights begin to flicker*

Ernie » *ready*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *nods yes*

Dink B » *nods yes*

Jude » *nods*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » Ok, everyone ready?

Ernie » *sends out energy to Jogen's brain; calls upon any spirit sign*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Tah JudeP! Lighten up, dear soul; you'll live longer.

Jude » Catch you later, JudeP. And thanks for your help!

judeparish » *cellphone rings; he answers, then listens*  Sorry guys, but I have to take this call outside. I could be a long while. Good luck with this. Leave me word on my blog if it works.

Ernie » *winks at Dink*

Dink B » *grins at Ernie and Bunny*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *begins to sing Ijsbeer drinking songs*

Dink B » *peeks into factory, whispers*  Wow!

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *begins hooking the chip and Jorgen up to a massive machine*

Ernie » *wiggles nose, sits on Bunny's head*

judeparish » *does a quick hand gesture, trailing green light*  Umm...Ernie, if you can sense anything, talk to him, but I'm getting no spirit residue from the flesh.

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *eyes everyone owlishly*  Well, we're drunk. No pressure here! This has never been tried before on an Ijsbeer! Whoa...I'm rhyming! I must really be drunk.

Jude » *enters, joins the group; watches avidly*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » *belches*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh! I don't believe I've ever witnessed a medical procedure. I DO hope I won't become faint.  *fans face*

Asbjörn Ijsbeer » All right! Step one of this procedure...is to get really drunk!  *tosses back nearly a full keg of Bass Ale*

judeparish » I got here first! Whee! Daniel Jorgen-Caiphias he shall be then, should all go well.

Svenge Ijsbeer » Ok, Asbjörn. I think we're ready. His name was JØrgen.

. . . [ cut to Svenge's Factory ] . . .

Dink B » *runs to catch up with the others; hates it when he's late!*

Jude » *exits to factory with Bunny & Ernie*

Svenge Ijsbeer » *exits to factory*

judeparish » *doesn't drink but holds on to a bottle to give to the new Dan; exits to the factory*

Jude »

Jude » L'chaim! Yes...let's adjourn to the factory.

Ernie » *licks spilled ale*  Squeak!

Bunny Stachekschwein » *lifts bottle*  To Life!

judeparish » I'm willing to go along with Svenge if he's willing to let us bring this Ijsbeer back from the brink of death...and from beyond the pale of personality death.

Svenge Ijsbeer » Yes, let's go over to the factory.

Ernie » *would like to try to connect with the vestigal personality that might be left; sends to Svenge:  Can't we at least try?*

Svenge Ijsbeer » I have all the necessary equipment over at the factory. Asbjörn is there, and can perform the procedure.  *hands out Bass Ale to everyone*

Jude » *nods*  Thanks. I'd love one. Well...I vote for the young Ijsbeer. What was his name, Svenge?

Svenge Ijsbeer » Unfortunately he has no mind left. As far as we know. It's up to us to make that decision.  *reaches into his coat*  I need a beer. Anyone else? I have a bunch.

Ernie » *scampers excitedly around the shop* Jude » Excellent! Ernie...can you transport him here?

Ernie » *giggles, claps paws! Yes! he'll do it!*

Jude » Could Ernie...er...mind-meld with him to determine his wishes?

Svenge Ijsbeer » *sighs* I think the young Ijsbeer didn't get a chance to live. At least this way he wouldn't be hooked up to a machine.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Might he be a willing participant, given the opportunity to answer the question? One can only speculate, I suppose...but, perhaps, it might be an opportunity for both Daniel and the ijsbeer to function more fully, and joyfully.

Svenge Ijsbeer » I did. He was very young. Still in his teens...he went up against Hrothgar himself! That coward walrus slithered away from his mighty teeth and zapped him with the ray.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Did you know this particular Ijsbeer, Svenge?

Jude » If it can't be Heiny (still love the symmetry there) or Millicent (Edna would kill us), then I'd vote for an Ijsbeer...a willing Ijsbeer.

Svenge Ijsbeer » I think he'd like being an Ijsbeer. Hell, I think he'd love it. Especially the being organic part. He's never even been drunk!

Jude » Suggestions, Svenge? You were fairly close to Daniel...

Bunny Stachelschwein » Hmmm. Oh dear. Would the Ijsbeer want to be a Daniel? Is not this the essential question?

judeparish » Well, do you think Edna would like a Coca-Cola bear for her best friend and playmate? It would tick Hothgar off to no end. And a blank organic hard-drive...sounds like a workable solution, broken down into technical terms.

Ernie » *contemplates the possibilities of a Daniel mouse...of course, Ernie has no trouble making things explode—if he wants to*

Jude » True...and I've come to enjoy the smell of nuclear fallout in the morning.

Svenge Ijsbeer » He'd have some difficulty making things explode as a mouse.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh! Who wouldn't want to be an Ijsbeer?  *giggles*

Jude » *chews lip*  I'm not sure, Svenge... *grins at Ernie*  He might like to be a mouse. He was rather intrigued by Ernie, as I recall. Of course, I myself am rather partial to Ijsbeer...and aliens.

Svenge Ijsbeer » That we can only assume, Jude. It's entirely possible that vestigal pieces of the old host would remain...do you think Daniel would want to be an Ijsbeer?

Jude » ...mind-wipe ray...does that mean his personality is irretrievable?

Svenge Ijsbeer » Asbjörn says no. There was absolutely no brain damage...he was hit by a Besöksadresse mind-wipe ray.

Jude » *nods thinking; grins at Bunny*  Nice sign...

Bunny Stachelschwein » *posts a sign in the shop window:  a peach shaped object with a pickle in it, surrounded by a red circle with a line throught it*  Who? The comatose ijsbeer?

Jude » Any chance he will recover his own personality, Svenge?

Svenge Ijsbeer » Well, yes...we do have a young comatose Ijsbeer, but we have to remember that this process is permanent. Once we transfer the "essence of Caiaphas," that's it. Into what...a massive space rat?

Jude » *winks at JudeP; leans against the shop wall, relieved that the chip has been safely removed*  Svenge, were any of the Ijsbeer mentally incapacitated during the Battle of Puget Sound? Might one of them work as a host?

judeparish » He seems a bit twitchy for his line of work.

Jude » Tsk... *watches Raoul disappear* ...Edna would have liked him as a host.

Raoul Ratón » *drops the chip in Svenge's paw and runs off*

judeparish » And BTW, Bunny, the Russian wouldn't like it if she found out I was patronizing the services of the sort you mention.

Raoul Ratón » *holds up a chip*  ¡Conseguido lo! ¡Aquí, gringos estúpidos! ¡Voy a casa de modo que pueda golpear a estas putas asquerosas!

judeparish » Sorry, fascinated with the guy's tale of woe, and now that the ward is up there's not much else I can do.

Ernie » *holds Daniel's hand*

Jude » JudeP, don't distract Raoul...delicate work, even with a hacksaw.  *grimaces*

Caiaphas » THE NIGHT! THE NIGHT! The....nigh......bloooooooooooooooooooooooooooorg....

judeparish » Okay, I think I get it. You tired to hit up what you thought was a prostitute for some action, and she hit you in the head with a violin. And she was Robust...you didn't talk to someone named Millicent now did you?

Jude » *cringes at hacksaw...envisions Edna May totally losing it*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Yeah, as long as we keep it safely locked up...and Hrothgar doesn't get hold of it.

Raoul Ratón » *starts going at Daniel's head with a hacksaw*

Jude » *watches Raoul work*  Svenge, can we keep Daniel's personality chip safe without implanting it in a new host right away?

Raoul Ratón » ¡Sí, prostitutes! ¿Usted no escuchaba, gringo? ¡Pagué cuatro cientos dólares placer oral...y en lugar de otro aquí estoy tocando el violín en la cabeza de la robusteza!

Bunny Stachelschwein » *giggles*  Oh, Mr. Parish, perhaps an evening with one of Marysville's finest might do you a world of good.

judeparish » Okay, we're not stupid (crazy maybe), but what do you want with prostitutes?

Ernie » *puts his paw on Daniel's head; strokes it gently*

Jude » *blinks at Raoul, grins* ...prostitutes... *chortles*

Raoul Ratón » Sí, sí...los. I'm que trabajan en él. Gringos estúpidos, siempre en una prisa. ¡Y yo sin mis prostitutes!  *begins jamming instruments into Daniel's head*

Caiaphas » THE NIGHT IS COMING! HROTHGAR WILL DESTROY YOU ALL!

judeparish » Raoul! The ward on the door is one way...you can come in!

Ernie » *keeps Danile spinning in the air, isolated from the others, glowing alternating colors*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Raoul! Get in there!

Jude » *pants, grins at Svenge*  Good to see you, big guy!  *takes a deep breath*  Okay..... *watches Daniel spinning above them* Now... where's Raoul?

Ernie » *separates Daniel out of the pack, levitates and spins him; he glows green, blue, purple, red, orange, yellow, spinning*

judeparish » Yes Svenge! Hold him down!  *begins to chant*  I'm throwing up a ward so no one can leave the store.  *a dark green flash bursts from the door*  Okay, it's as secure as I can make it.

Jude » *finds herself bound tightly to Daniel & Svenge* ...murrfft...Ernie?

Caiaphas » *growls; attempts to move*

Svenge Ijsbeer » *tackles Jude and Daniel*

Ernie » *glows greeen spins around Daniel glowing all the colors of the spectrum*

Jude » *knocks pistol away*  ERNIE!!! NOW!!!  *struggles with Daniel*

Caiaphas » *begins shooting*

Jude » *dives for Daniel in a body lock*

Caiaphas » *raises his pistol*

judeparish » GET HIM ERNIE!

Jude » DANIEL! Ernie, quick! Hold him!

Caiaphas » *runs in, robot saliva dripping from his chin*  BOOM!  *looks around*

Jude » *smiles at JudeP*  Yeah, we're all throwing stuff out there to see if it sticks. Bunny, I...

judeparish » Bunny, I never said I wanted to do that to Dink...I said that he'd probably be someone who'd think it would be cool. I'm just airing all the ideas I can think of. And I've answered your question several times.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *is aghast and speechless at the suggestion of the disappearance of Dink's personality*  Mr. Parish, I think you and I have very different viewpoints about the world. And please, can someone answer my question. CAN WE NOT REMOVE THE CHIP, AND KEEP IT SAFE UNTIL A WILLING RECIPIENT IS FOUND? FIRST THINGS FIRST! LET'S GET THE CHIP OUT AND THEN FIGURE THIS OUT!

Jude » I suppose we could try just keeping it safe until a good host could be found, Bunny. I'm not sure about the mechanics involved...need Svenge or Raoul to answer that one.

judeparish » Because Edna wouldn't like it, Bunny.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *raps counter*  HELLO?? Please address my question. Can anyone tell me why we just can't keep it safe until a willing recipient is found?

judeparish » I know it wouldn't Jude, that's why I said I wouldn't want to do that even if Dink thought it was cool.

Jude » Whoa!  *blinks rapidly*  I don't think that one would fly with either Dink or Edna...or Bunny or Ernie!

judeparish » To merge with Dan...talking about willing participants.

Bunny Stachelschwein » What is it that Dink would think would be cool, JudeP?

judeparish » True, Jude. Consider my statement retracted. But she would be highly upset that we didn't put his personality into something that she could hang out with.

Jude » *re-enters DZ*  I wish Svenge were here...he might have a solid suggestion.  *frowns at JudeP*  I think Daniel is far more than a play toy to Edna May. Good thing she didn't hear you say that.

judeparish » Because Edna would have a major hissy without her play toy around. Now, Dink would probably think it would be cool, but I hate to do that to a kid.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Can anyone tell me why we can't simply keep the chip safe once it's removed until a recipient is found?

Jude » *nods*  I hear you, Ernie. Okay...no animal, unless he/she/it volunteers. Hold on a sec... *exits to do a quick recon for Svenge or Daniel*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh, I'm certain Ernie could keep the chip safe! I think one should respect the wishes of creatures we call animals. Perhaps they have a higher intelligence than we are aware of... *eyes Ernie* ...I vote no on the animal tranfer. It must be someone willing to particpate. Ernie will not help if any other choice is made.

judeparish » True...whatever those creatures are, they are NOT happy with Dan right now anyway. Shadow has been able to gather that much. Other than that, there seems to be a scrying lock on the area that she can't break...that means they're pretty powerful spirit mages.

Jude » *shakes head*  No, don't think so, JudeP. Something very sinister is going on down there. Don't think that should be considered until we know more about it.

judeparish » Current BF's mind in the ex BF's body. I see what you mean, Jude. Hmm...if the creatures hiding down in the sewers are sentient, maybe would could use one of them?

Jude » *chortles*  Sorry...I just keep thinking about blending Heiny and Daniel...kind of poetic, don't ya' think? Except, of course, Heiny would be dead-set against it, of course. And it might really mess with Edna's head. Which is messy enough as it is.

judeparish » I was originally hoping that Dink might be able to rebuild Dan so that this didn't happen again, considering his extraordinary mechanical skills.

Jude » Svenge—someone—suggested a varkling or a moutain goat. It's a possibility, at least until a more suitable host could be found.

judeparish » I should think the personality chip should be okay...but I'm not that up on alien tech to say for sure.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *giggles at the thought of Millicent embodying Daniel's personality*  Oh! I say! Would it not be possible to remove the chip and keep it safe until a suitable recipient could be found?  *casts a rasied eyebrow at JudeP*

judeparish » *shudders*  Now that would be scary. True, but we're transferring a person's personality into the golem so the ability to reason should remain intact, unlike if we were creating a creature from scratch. Look at Shadow, she's a...nevermind...almost let that one slip.

Jude » Yeah, I'm hoping for human, but we might be able to work with something else as a temporary solution. Heh...too bad we couldn't convince Millicent...but then, we'd have to deal with an outraged Edna May.

Ernie » *shakes his head no at the suggestion of his participation in golem making*

Bunny Stachelschwein » I've found human beings, though somewhat unpredictable, have a facility for reason that robots and golems don't have.

Jude » *re-enters*  Okay...just posted a message on the hot tub bulletin board.

judeparish » Only if we don't set the proper bans/geas on it. We'd need some very detailed geas, but not impossible. Ernie is good at detail work, correct?

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh dear me, a golem. I don't know. I've met several in my time—not so easy to control. We might be faced with a variation of the same problem.

judeparish » Or we could always go the other route of not using a live person at all. We have enough magical power around here to create a fairly decent golem for Dan to inhabit. He'd just have to be willing to wear a wig because he'd be bald and a bandanna to hide the glyph so somone wouldn't wipe it off and shut him down.

Jude » Not a bad idea, Bunny...not bad at all! Hold on a sec...I'll be right back.  *exits to hot tub area to post notice*

ATTENTION!  We're looking for a volunteer to be the recipient for a personality trans-plant...male preferred, but we'll work with whatever we can get. Again, human would be good, but we may not be picky. Volun-teers join us at DunkelZauber ASAP. Thanks
~ Jude et al

Bunny Stachelschwein » Well, I think Jude is correct about free will. Perhaps we should post a notice asking for volunteers?

Jude » *nods*  Another good suggestion. Where is he, by the way?  *scans shop*

judeparish » It's not adversarial, Jude—just annoying. And I am focusing on the task at hand...maybe one of Svenge's brain-injured comrades?

Jude » Harcourt is needed to manage Cirque de Marysville. Now Heathcliff might be a possibility...he probably wouldn't even notice the change.

judeparish » Any of the other Fouquettes worth using? I gather they're all a little off-kilter.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Well, my dear Mr. Parish, shall we set our minds to the task at hand? I always find self-righteousness makes for blind spots. Have a seat!  *sits in chair—!!PFOOT!!*

Jude » *frowns at the two adversaries*  Don't make me smack you two...I'm actually liking the idea of "volunteering" Heiny...but then I have that problem of reconciling the 'free will' factor.

judeparish » *swats the glasses away*  Sorry, I only trust the gear I get from Heppi. And now Shadow is swearing she's hearing strange noises in the abandoned sewer access tunnels.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Perhaps your own vision could use some clearing, Mr. Parish.  *offers Ace Ventura sunglasses*

Jude » People, please... *holds up hands in peace sign* ... JudeP, we need you and Bunny to concentrate of finding a proper host.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Have a cigar. It might improve your sense of humor. And you might live longer.  *pulls down his pants, moons JudeP, giggles*

judeparish » Not the shop, this whole bloody town. Ernie is powerful, but he's not reponsible for leaving the dangerous stuff in the front room...or is he? Sorry. I just get a bit crabby about how this has all fallen out of control. I still say Heiny's body should be used for Dan's resurrection.

Bunny Stachelschwein » My dear Mr. parish, no one ever asked you to take care of this shop. Ernie is quite capable of performing that task. In case you hadn't noticed.

Jude » Let's focus on a suitable host...way too early for finger pointing, eh guys?

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh, please, Mr. Parish. Now is not the time for your moral superioity. Have a cigar. There are forces at work beyond our own tiny minds. Heiny and the skin were destiny.

judeparish » Well, Dan might be willing to part with the shifter skin since he knows how dangerous it is. And he'd be no more unstable than he already is, because Heiny is a nutbar anyway. Damn it Bunny, why did you have that skin laying out for Heiny to swipe? I only came here to investigate the Baron and your carelessness with your toys has turned watching this place into a fulltime job. You do realize the longer Jim keeps that bong in that humidor, it will cause him to have REAL visions instead of drug induced ones, right?

Jude » We could pose the suggestion to Raoul, I suppose. Still, I kinda like the Heiny proposition.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Ventriloquism, you know.  *winks*

Floyd » Heiny?  *giggles*  Would he retain the lovely fur coat?

Jude » Umm...nah, not Floyd. We like him too much to lose him.

Floyd » *grimaces, shakes spear*  BANG!

Bunny Stachelschwein » Well, let's see—Floyd, perhaps?

Jude » *laughs*  JudeP, what a wonderful idea! And the two ex-lovers would be re-united!

judeparish » hmmm...maybe one of the Fouquettes? That'd solve my problem with Heiny quite nicely.

Jude » *mambos while she thinks*  People, suggestions! I haven't had caffeine yet. I need help here.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *giggles*  EVERYBODY MAMBO!

Ernie » *message to Daniel:  ROBOT! Does his best Daniel impersonation; opens his mouth, produces a sound not unlike a Mambo*

Jude » Knowing Edna May, she'd opt for a human recipient...altho' she might like a varkling for a companion. Speaking of varklings, are there any left in Marysville? Daniel made off with quite a few. Too bad we couldn't use Raoul...she likes the Latino type.  *grins*  And then, of course, we could all understand him.

Bunny Stachelschwein » *giggles*  I love the smell of naplam in the morning. It smells like...victory!

Jude » Hmmmm... *chews lower lip while pondering the problem*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh yes, Mr. Parish, we are ready for the unfortunate Mr. Caiaphais. We hope to foster him into a new incarnation. but do we have a willing person? Perhaps some lobotomized patient from the sanitarium?

Jude » *races into the store*  I heard Daniel's calling card... *grins*... nuclear fallout in the morning. Ya' gotta love it.

Floyd » *crouches in battle-ready stance; shakes his spear*  OOOOOOO EEEE, OOOO AAHH AAHH, Ting Tang WALLA WALLA Bing BANG!!!!

judeparish » I just saw Dan running in this direction. Be ready...

Ernie » *giggles, is always ready for whatever is needed*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *hears explosions, awakes*
Oh la! I wonder if Daniel is about to make an appearance. Are we ready for him, Ernie?  *flies excitedly around the shop on velvet slippers*

Ernie » *explosions wake him; wiggles his whiskers, snaps into alert mode; sins in all directions, glowing green, scanning for Daniel...excuse me, spins in all directions, although sinning in all directions would be fun to try sometime; sends out telepathic call to Daniel:
"Here Kitty, kitty , kitty."*

judeparish » FYI:  spirit magic and robots just don't mix well regardless of how sentient a robot is. Now enchantment magic might work, only because it deals with objects. And Jude,it's a spear, not a staff...watch out for the sharp end.

. . . . . [ cut to DunkelZaubern ] . . .

Caiaphas » *perks his head up; runs in the direction of the explosions*

Svenge Ijsbeer » *bombs explode in the direction of the DunkelZaubern*

. . . . . [cut back to Reflux ] . . .

Svenge Ijsbeer » I don't understand a word he just said, but he seems to love Bass Ale...so he's my kind of guy. I'm off to set the explosives. Everyone get ready.  *exits*

Raoul Ratón » Sí. Puedo conseguir su viruta en segundos, gringos. Necesitamos apresurarnos, aunque. He pagado un número de prostitutes mantenerme oral, y estoy impaciente por volver a casa de modo que poder conseguir comenzados.

Svenge Ijsbeer » Ernie, you're the only one that can get that chip. We've done some tests, and JudeP's magic won't work on Daniel. You've had success stopping the Besöksadresse in the past. I hope your magics will be able to hold him long enough to have a technician extract the chip, then you can destroy his body. If there aren't any objections, I'm going to set some thermonuclear devices off near the shop. That should lure him here. Daniel is drawn to large explosions. We have an expert in robotics on exchange from the Ratóns of Ningunos Gatos Permitidos IV, Raoul Ratón. He doesn't speak any English, but he knows the HAL9000 series like the back of his hand. If Ernie can hold him, Raoul can get the chip in a matter of minutes.

Svenge Ijsbeer » Our patrols are unable to locate Daniel. I believe he's been fitted with some sort of cloaking device. If we can catch him, I have a plan to end this once and for all. I've been looking over his schematics and have discovered that his core personality is on a chip that could be safely removed from his robotic body—leaving it available to transfer into an organic host. We have perfected a transfer method that would leave him completely organic, and therefore unassailable by the Besöksadresse. If we can just get that chip, his body can be destroyed without fear of losing Daniel. We have two problems. We need the chip...and a suitable host. Transferring Daniel's memories and personality will (we think) completely erase the host's current personality and that really wouldn't be fair to whoever is selected for the transfer. I need some ideas. Everyone have a Bass Ale and do some brainstorming.

7.23.05 (still at DunkelZaubern). . .

Dink B » *fade to white*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *smiles at Jude; settles into blissful movie viewing*

Jude » *catches the exchange, nods, grinning* ...uh huh...

Bunny Stachelschwein » *grins at Dink*

Dink B » *winks at Bunny*

Ernie » *winks at Rev Jim*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *murmurs in his sleep*  I'd like the black 'cuffs, please. To go. In a brown bag.

Dink B » *sits by Bunny, leans his head on his knee while he watches and eats popcorn*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *the two movies play simultaneously on two players, Bunny's mind weves the two tales into one*

Dink B » *leaps in the air, punches it with his fist*  YESsss! Vin and Ringu!

Jude » I can! Bring it on!

Bunny Stachelschwein » Alright, then Chronicles of Riddick it is. And, then, for a double feature, how about Ringu? Can you stand it? Maybe we could even watch both of them at thte same time.

Jude » Hey, I like Vin Diesel! Pitch Black was a fun movie.  *laughs*  Okay. I'm up for Riddick and popcorn!  *settles back with three of her favorite people to watch the movie* Ah, yes...I'm loving it!

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh, oui, moi ausssi re taglag.

Dink B » Jude, if you want, I'll put on a DVD for you. We just got The Chronicles of Riddick! You'll like it. Vin Diesel is awesome!

Bunny Stachelschwein » Yes, Dinkies, I'd love to hear about those secret things. You tell me at your own pace, in your own time. How about we get the DVD player up here too? What shall we watch tonight?

Jude » Bunny, Dink, I'm going to curl up over here for a little bit. I'm experiencing super taglag. But I'll keep an eye out for Svenge, okay?

Bunny Stachelschwein » Well, my boy, have a root beer float!  *one floats up to Dink from the kitchen, alond with a bowl of popcorn, which he presents to Jude*

Dink B » *blushes, ducks head*  Awwww. It was easy. You know, Bunny, I can do other things. Secret things. But I'll tell you later.  *grins shyly* Some things even Vin doesn't know about.

Jude » *grins at Dink*  Yeah...I'd like to know that too. You're an extraordinary boy, Dink.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Tell me, my dear Dinkies, how did you get so very very clever? You apparently saved us all from doom and destruction! You have my deepest gratitude and respect, my dear boy.

Dink B » *guides Rev Jim to a soft couch, covers him up, kisses him on the cheek, and floats back to Bunny, Ernie and Jude*

Jude » *tries to focus, but figures it's probably way too late to go after Daniel now; decides to kick back and enjoy the company for a bit*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *giggles*  Oh well, things were a bit mad here for a bit—you know, everything is usually so calm here... *giggles* ...and, well, the Rev is generous and...

Dink B » Ernie! Ernie! Ernie!  *spins giddily*

Ernie » *rubs his head against Dink's, sends message:  Good job!; winks at Dink*

Dink B » Wow! I know what that is.  *giggles*  I smell it sometimes coming from Vin and Izzie's room.

Ernie » *leaves 11 of his selves scanning for Daniel, while he jumps on dink's head*

Jude » Heya Dink! Good to see you.  *grins*  Great work this morning at the pub.

Dink B » *spins wildly around Bunny and Ernie, moonwalks in mid-air*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Come on up here and spin! Oh La, there you are!

Dink B » Bunny!  *giggles, floats up to join him, Jude and Rev Jim*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *spins in continual state of bliss*  Dinkers!

Dink B » *enters grinning*  Party!

Jude » *chortles*  A human whoopie cushion... *grins at Bunny*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *snorts, eyes drift closed, passes bong to Bunny as he drifts off; passes wind, sighs softly* .......excuse please

Jude » Shush, Rev....go to sleep. *rocks him in the air; sways to Bunny's song**

Bunny Stachelschwein » Wow. Good stuff, Rev.  *sings*  Oh I say I looked over Jordan, an' what did I see-ee? Comin' for ta carry me home...Yes, I looked over Jordan, an' what did I see-ee? A'comin' for ta carry me home.

Jude » *giggles, suddenly feels like popping popcorn*

Bunny Stachelschwein » I looked over Jordan, an' what did I see?

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *smiles vaguely* Daniel who?

Ernie » *bong smoke makes him giggle, but he maintains clear-eyed focus*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » Aye's swinging low, sweet, sweet charry-uhhht, cumin' for ta carry me on a'home, swing looooow, sweet charry-uhht, a'cumin' for ta carry us all on home...

Ernie » *shakes head: no*

Jude » *helps herself to the Rev's bong, exhales, feels the world drop away*  Oh yes... *blinks* ...Daniel...no sign yet, Ernie?  *refocuses*

Ernie » *stays on the look-out for Daniel*  Squeak! Squeak!
*a nice counterpoint to the music*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » mmmmm mmmm mmmmmm mmm mmmm, aye's a'cumin' on home to meet mah maker, lawd, aye's a'cumin' on home oh lawd...

Bunny Stachelschwein » *keeps time to Rev's humming; starts a sychopated rhythm and hums a haunting soprano harmony*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » Oh, aye's cumin' home, lawdy, lawdy, aye's cumin' on home.......

Bunny Stachekschwein » Oh! Lovely!  *claps hands in glee*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » I am. I am indeed.  *inhales deeply from the bong; hums a negro spiritual*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Rev? Are you still conscious?

Jude » Yeah. Dink was pretty amazing! And lord, can he pack away sundaes...six of them, without coming up for air once.

Bunny Stachekschwein » No, I've not seen that dear, if peculiar, woman since the feast. Oh! Where can that marvelous dinster be? Ernie told me he defused some nukes today! What a divine child!

Jude » Speaking of which, I don't suppose either of you have heard from her, have you?  *growls*  As if we don't have enough to deal with without her tripping off again...

Bunny Stachelschwein » Yes, yes yes yes! yes!

Jude » Like Edna and her Spam attacks.  *laughs*

Bunny Stachelschwein » And sometimes, it causes me to repeat myself  *giggles, while juggling chainsaws*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » And repeat, and repeat, and repeat.  *nods sympathetically*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Well yes, sometimes Tourettes can make me a bit, well, giddy... *tumbles over an over in midair*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Well yes, sometimes Tourettes can make me a bit, well, giddy... *tumbles over an over in midair*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » He was here a while ago. I'm sure he'll be back at any minute.

Floyd » OoOOOO eEEEEeee ahhhhh

Jude » Rev, I think we need to find you a girlfriend.  *grins at Bunny*  You do be flying high tonight, my good fellow. Hey, where's Dink?  *scans room*  He just missed JudeP and Shadow.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Ah! Jude! Rev! Come join me up here!  *spins happily near the ceiling*  Floyd? care to join us?

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *eyes Jude, envisions handcuffs, averts eyes, focuses on Ernie; starts*  Bong? BONG! Yes! Marvelous idea!  *runs to fetch it*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *giggles*  Ah! Rev! Shall she have a toot on that bong you've tucked away inside of Tuck?  *giggles*  But then, we're there already, aren't we?

Jude » *re-enters*  Couldn't find him, but I left a note for him to join us asap.

Ernie » *wiggles his nose—noses—all 12 or 24*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *smiles at Bunny*  I could watch you for hours, you know. Who needs drugs when you're around.  *smiles happily*

Bunny Stachelschwein » *spins like a dervish up to the rafters*  One potato, two potatoe, three potatoe, four!  *lights cigar, it explodes; whoopie cshions fly madly about—!!PFOOT!!—farting on their own accord; Philip Glass blares madly through the shop*

Jude » Hold on a sec...I'm going to pop over to the bar & grill to see if Svenge is around. Be right back... Bunny Stachelschwein » *spins madly like a dervish up into the rafter*  Sorry! Tourettes!

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *giggles*  It is funny, though, one must admit. It's like an acid flash, without the acid.

Bunny Stachelschwein » AAARRRGGGHHHHH! Ring around the rosie, pocket full of peter peter pumkion eater, my mother told me to choose the very best all fall down!!!

Rev Jim Ignatowski » Well I, for one, am having an elephant of a taglag problem on my end.

Jude » Blogdrive demons...persistent little buggers.

Bunny Stachekschwein » Mercury retrograde, no doubt.

Bunny Stachekschwein » Mercury retrograde, no doubt.

Bunny Stachekschwein » Mercury retrograde, no doubt.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh dear, I do seem to having quite a bit of difficulty communicating, and I seem to be repeating myself.  *sighs*  I may have to go lie down.

Jude » Or the tagboard could be possessed again.

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh dear, I do seem to having quite a bit of difficulty communicating, and I seem to be repeating myself.  *sighs*  I may have to go lie down.

Jude » Bunny... *raises an eyebrow* ...you okay?

Bunny Stachekschwein » Well Jim, once a Persian princess slapped me.  *strokes cheek in remembrance, giggles, gazes sadly at his crotch*  But, well...

Jude » *runs hand along JudeP's staff* ...er, that didn't come out quite right. I meant this staff...right here.  *flushes while holding out silver weapon*  Hope I don't have to use it on Daniel, but I'm glad to have the chance to play with it. Very cool piece.  *twirls staff back and forth in her hands*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh well, Jim. I was once slapped by a persian princess.  *giggle*  Ah, the memory lingers... *strokes his cheek in remembrance*

Jude » Keep trying, Ernie. And thank you!

Ernie » *thinks: no, nothing yet*

Jude » *grins at Jim*  Sorry. I'll try to find another way next time.  *concentrates on Ernie*  Anything?

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *enters, points at Jude*  She smacked me..........I think I liked it. It's very disturbing.

Ernie » *or perhaps, uh 24*

Ernie » *splits himself into 12 and covers all points of the compass*

Ernie » *oops! giggles; What could be better than two Ernies?; splits himself into 12 and covers all points of the compass*

Ernie » *scanning for Daniel*

Ernie » *scanning for Daniel*

Ernie » *glows green, levitates and spins in circles, sending out beams of infrared light from his eyes*

Bunny Stachelschwein » Oh! La! Well, I'm certain Ernie can contain him if he can be located. ernie is, after all, rather remarkable.  *giggles*

Jude » *laughs*  Excellent! There you are! We need you to see if you can corral Daniel, so we can remove the errant chip and reprogram him. Of course, we have to find him first to do that...I've left word at Svenge's...when he comes around, hopefully he'll meet us here and we can look for Daniel.

Ernie » *peeks out of Jude's pocket.  giggles*  So, how can we help?

Bunny Stachelschwein » Yes. I think so.  *giggles*

Jude » Bunny! Am I glad to see you! Is Ernie with you?

Bunny Stachelschwein » *enters from backroom*  Tah, everyone!

. . . . .

judeparish » I hate it when we talk in echo like that.  *hands Jude the spear*  Have fun...the noise in the sewer sounds right up my alley.  *strides quickly back up the path, out the ladies room, and back to the sewers*

judeparish » *nods*  If you're sure, Jude. I'll give you the spear to play with in trade...expolosive diherrea might come in handy, and it may even knock Dan offline.

Shadow » *nods*  If you're sure, Jude. I'll give you the spear to play with in trade...expolosive diherrea might come in handy, and it may even knock Dan offline.

Jude » *whispers in a non-existant voice to JudeP*  It's okay. We're not really here. If you need to investigate, go...I'll continue looking for Ernie.  *smiles a non-present smile*

Shadow » Um, master...I know you're busy with the killer robot and alien walrus thing, but I heard something in the tunnels. It sounds like something flat slapping against something hollow...and the clicking of large teeth. It's comming from the section Jim was found in.

judeparish » Waiting for people can be a problem, eh Jim?  *starts to sway; eyes droop, pop back open*  Oh dear...Shadow is trying to contact me.

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *coughs*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *mutters to no one in particular*  And I, of course, hear nothing.  *rubs cheek, has forbidden thoughts about Jude in the dark with handcuffs; plays with himself-—uh, by himself, by himself!—idly in the shadows of the shop while he waits for Bunny, Ernie, Dink, Lexie, Vinnie, Izzie, Svenge, Anyone! to come; eyes liniment bottles longingly, sees Floyd growl at him, edges away slowly*

judeparish » *whispers*  got it; reading old political satires.

Jude » *whispers offstage*  I sent you an email to explain.

judeparish » hmmm...so you think they're somewhere at the Baron's manse?  *decides to take the hint and is quiet now*

Jude » No...doesn't work quite like that. You have to have a specific destination in mind.  *voices fade*

judeparish » *follows*  Okay, if it takes you literally anywhere you wish, you think Edna just said:  I wish to go where Daniel is?

Jude » Through the ladies room and down the corridor to the platform chamber, JudeP. Follow me.  *exits with JudeP*

judeparish » Okay, Jude where we headed? If you checked the blogs, you know I have the spear you love so much, the bone glove usually weakens my opponents, making them easier to dispatch and the glove I lent you last time actually is a bit more powerful then I let on. When I'm wearing it, it shoots some heavy electrical shocks and the spikes will cut thru anything I WANT them to cut through.

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *rubs cheek with wounded expression*  And I really liked her.  *frowns, mildly confused*  Ah, why do I feel a little turned on?  *shuffles into the frontroom to tidy up*

judeparish » *follows tightening his gloves one last time to be sure they're ready*

Jude » Yes, I have something. I'll show it to you on the way. Come on!  *exits with JudeP to the platform chamber*

judeparish » I'll come with, but if I go I can't promise that. Are you carrying any weapons in case Dan gets violent towards us?

Jude » I am...but I don't want him harmed, JudeP. Whatever we do, his life must be spared. That's why it's imperative we find Ernie. He can do it without loss of life.

judeparish » Are you armed, Jude? Daniel may not want to go quietly.

Jude » I don't think he's here right now. I need to get to the platforms now. Do you want to come with me, JudeP? Jim will be able to handle the store.

judeparish » The only other thing I can think of is to keep Dink inside and close at hand...if he's as good with machines as bombs, we may be able to use his skills.

Jude » Actually, I believe they will take you anywhere you wish to go. Literally anywhere. I think Edna may have disappeared via the platforms.

judeparish » Hmm, I've never used the platforms. I've heard of them...magic fueled jump-gates arranged all through the West Coast right?

Jude » *nods*  Exactly That was my thinking, too.

judeparish » We need to see if either of them have the power to herd Daniel into a spot where he can be deactivated so we can find out what is causing this resumption of his pyromanical tendencies.

Rev Jim Ignatowski » Certainly, Jude, JudeP. I shall await you here. Fear not. I shall not let you down.

Jude » Damn! ...sorry Rev, JudeP. I've got another place I can look for them. I'll go by way of the platforms. Jim, if you could watch over the store, that would help. JudeP, want to come with? or no?

judeparish » I'd say stay here in the shop and act as a central communications person. We need Ernie and Bunny to be aware of Dan's breakdown when they show up.

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *draws himself up with grave dignity*  No, sir. I am not accustomed to being manslapped...or woman-slapped. What can I do to help. I stand...if shakily...at your service.

judeparish » Jim, you're not used to aliens, ghost, shifters and the like are you? If your not used to the sights of the "shadow world," your mind shuts down and tries to reoganized the experience into terms you understand.

judeparish » I havent' seen Ernie or Bunny all day and I've been trying to get ahold of people since 5am Central.

Jude » Side trips, JudeP?  *frowns*  I'm trying to find Ernie. I'm hoping he can corral Daniel until we can fix him.

judeparish » Yeah, Jude, I'm still here. You needed the slap, Jim. You've been in a fuzzy state since you saw whatever it was you saw down in the sewers...which are now a mess by the way.

Jude » I'm sorry, Jim. Really. JudeP, are you still here?

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *looks at JudeP, points at Jude*  She struck me. Whack! Slapped me. Just like that.

Jude » JudeP?? Yes!!

judeparish » I seem to keep falling one step behind...something keeps throwing up coincidental barriers, keeping me from catching up with you or Daniel to deal with him...it appears I may not be much help with all the little "side trips" someone keeps throwing at me.

Jude » I'm sorry, Jim. Couldn't be helped. I really need you to focus right now. Okay? Now, where are Bunny and Ernie? Are they here? or near here? When will they be back?

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *head snaps back at slap, eyes blink wide open*  Jude? Jude! You slapped me!  *looks profoundly wounded*

Jude » *slaps Rev Jim, but gently*  Jim! Focus! I need your help!

Rev Jim Ignatowski » I'm here, madam! Prod me not!  *staggers to feet*  We have an excellent item over here............

Jude » *sighs, smiles*  Jim, it's me. Jude. Do you know where Bunny and Ernie are? I need their services rather badly right now. The explosions...you hear them, right? It's Daniel...or the Besöksadresse. We need Ernie to put his whammy on Daniel until he can fix him. Jim?  *prods him again*

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *groans*  Do not prod me, madam. I stand..........no, sit, lie actually.......at your service.  *smacks lips, gazes blearily at the murky figure*  How might I help you, madam?

Jude » *pivots on her heel*  Jim?  *re-enters store*  Jim? Are you here?  *stares at large pile of rags on the floor, prods it*  Jim? You in there?

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *rolls over, sways as he sits up, waves the air*  Please, no, browse on, please. I'll be here if you need help with an item.  *slumps back into a hazy heap*

Jude » *races into the shop, scans showroom*  Bunny!? Ernie!? Dink!? We need to do something about Daniel... he's gone into berserker mode big time! Ernie...are you here? Can you corral him for us while we figure out how to remove the errant chip and reprogram him? Bunny! Ernie!  *growls*  Where is everyone!  *exits to look elsewhere*

. . . [ cut to DunkelZaubern ] . . .

Jude » *head snaps up at sound of thunderous underground explosions; the ground rocks beneath her feet*  !!!....Daniel!  *hears manhole covers hitting and ricocheting off the streets; thinks furiously, then makes a run for DZ; calls Bunny on cellphone, leaves msg*  Bunny, we need Ernie's help asap! Daniel's in berserker mode again! Please meet us back at DZ if you can, with Ernie...Jude out.  *flips phone closed, exits to DZ*

judeparish » *his flat is still standing, if only by the grace of the wards*

Caiaphas » *runs off with a fresh bag of varklings*

Caiaphas » *cataclysmic explosion rocks the sewers, manholes all over town shoot into the sky like massive discuses; disarmed bombs at Svenge's click harmlessly*

Strangely Familiar » *cackle* *snooooooort* *pushes more buttons*

judeparish » *calls Jude on cellphone*  Point taken; but with the invasions and Shadow's portents of doom she's had me preparing for, I've never had time to investigate that section of the sewers. Lord only knows what the Baron is looking for there.

Jude » *returns JudeP's call*  Hmmm, JudeP...I'm certain the Baron is involved in some way. And there's still the matter of whatever Rev Jim discovered in the sewer system. Although I definitely smelled Besöksadresse—their 'aroma' is unmistakable—I have a feeling what Jim discovered has nothing to do with them. And that is where I sense the Baron's fingerprint the most. It can't be just coincidence that he's headquartered his labs here. And Edna May is still missing. I've no idea where she's gone, but wouldn't be surprised if she's attempting to search the Baron's lair.  *exits to do a little research*

judeparish » *calls Jude's cellphone*  Jude I've been one step ahead or behind you all morning. I've checked with my sources. The Baron is not directly involved in this incident. It appears he has some other plan taking up the bulk of his time. Whoever is behind it may work for him but not directly. That's all I know about his involvement at this point. If I find anything more, I'll relay as best I can. My gear messes with comm signals so I can't promise you'll be able to reach me.  *turns off phone and continues his hunt*

. . . [ cut to back to Reflux ] . . .

Jude » Heh...damn attractive man, but odd. Then again, who isn't here, hm?  *chuckles*  Lead on, young sir! The sundaes await!  *exits with Dink*

Dink B » I think he's gone again.

Jude » JudeP!  *whirls to greet him*  With the help of Dink here, we've managed to nip this calamity in the butt#&151er bud—but we have a few others brewing. Have you heard anything from the Baron on your proposal? .....JudeP??

judeparish » *walks in wearing his full battle-gear, which still looks kinda casual compared to non-magical gear*  Any word on where the signals are coming from? Check my blog for my gear loadout...not typing it again. Bloody fine thing to wake up to, nearly blowing up all the sewer system. Good work Dink. So you're good with mechanical items too. We may need that skill to tear Dan apart and rebuild him later...think your up to it?

Jude » *grins at Dink, then frowns*  We're going to need the energy to figure out how to save Daniel and end this Besöksadresse problem...and find Edna May. The daft woman's completely disappeared...

Dink B » *moonwalks on air beside Jude, follows her to the grill*

Jude » *kneels to check Svenge, who's breathing steadily and mumbling in his sleep*  We'll let him rest... *grins, gathers up the fuses*  These we'll take with us, yes? Well out of Daniel's reach. To the grill, Wonderboy! I think I'll have a sundae myself.

Dink B » *beams*  Mega-excellent! What do you want to do with these? *points at the pile of fuses*

Jude » *scruffs Dinks hair*  You're an amazing kid, Dinkster! Come on...let's check Svenge, then I'll treat you to a hot fudge sundae at the grill.

Dink B » *smiles, blushes, ducks head*  I got an A in mechanical science. Vin says I've got a gift... *giggles* ...but then Vinnie can't put a battery in a remote control.  *laughs mischievously*

Jude » *enters panting, sees Dink working*  I'll be damned!!! Heh, hail the Mighty Dink!

Dink B » *runs into the bar & grill, scans rooms for thermonuclear devices, hums offkey as he begins defusing them; his fingers fly over the devices, defusing one, then another, and another, until they're all disarmed with the fuses removed to a neat pile*

. . . [ cut to Svenge's Bar & Grill ] . .

Rev Jim Ignatowski » *stirs from a heap on the floor*  Mmrrfflemuggnumpt! The store's closed. Go away.  *slips back into an unconscious stupor*

Jude » Oh crap... *races after him* ...Dink! Wait!

Dink B » *rolls eyes*  If Bunny were here, he'd believe me! I can do it. You just have to trust me. I'll meet you at the bar & grill.  *races out of the shop*

Jude » *halts, spins back to Dink*  Que?  *blinks uncertainly*  These are bombs, Dink...real bombs. I appreciate your wanting to help, but...

Dink B » Wait......uh, I can do it for you.

Jude » Yes, and right away...before Daniel returns to set them off.  *bites lower lip*  I've got to go see Sheriff Shankweiller...he must have some bomb experts at the station. Thanks kid.

Dink B » *shakes head no*  I'm not sure where they are right now. You need someone to defuse some bombs?

Jude » *swings back to storeroom*  Dink?!!! Yes, we've another emergency. Daniel's gone haywire and planted thermonuclear devices all over the bar. I've got to find someone who can disarm them. Do you know where I can find Bunny or Ernie? Fast?

Dink B » Hi Jude!  *smiles shyly*  What's the matter?
Your face is all red.

Jude » *bursts into the store*  Bunny? Ernie? We need your help...hello? Anyone?  *heads for door, muttering*  Sheriff Shankweiller maybe...yeah, bomb squad!

. . . [ cut to DunkelZaubern ]

Jude » *turns to study the thermonuclear devices*  Daniel...I'd know that signature anywhere.  *shakes head*  We need an expert to defuse these babies. And I'd better shake it before Daniel returns to finish the job.  *exits running for DunkelZaubern*

Jude » *enters, sees the thermonuclear devices, and Svenge lying wounded on the floor, kneels to him*  Svenge?! Can you hear me?  *props the unconscious Ijsbear's head at a better angle*  I've got to find Ernie, or Floyd. They can heal you. Hang on, big guy!  *spins on her heel and exits running; stops mid-stride and turns back to the bar*  Wait a sec...I didn't see any blood.  *races back to the bar and bends over Svenge, checking for injuries; probing gently, she feels heavy armor buried beneath his thick winter coat; sits back on her heels with a grin*  Good Ijsbeer!  *strokes his face*  I'm not ready to lose you, big guy.

. . . . .

judeparish » DAMN...SVENGE THERE ARE NUKES ALL OVER THE PLACE...SOBER UP AND GET A BOMB TEAM DOWN HERE ASAP!!  *exits to get help*

. . . . .

Caiaphas » No, master, I am not finished here.....I understand. I will complete my task later.  *exits*

Caiaphas » ***INCOMING TRANSMISSION***

Caiaphas » *begins placing thermonuclear devices all over the Bar & Grill*

Svenge Ijsbeer » *falls over*

Caiaphas » *shoots*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Wha?!?!? SOUND THE.....

Caiaphas » *raises a pistol*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Hmm...the only spirituality we Ijsbeer need is, well....Bass Ale. Still, glad to have you back!  *holds out a massive paw*

Caiaphas » I've been....relearning my purpose. A spiritual journey, if you will.

Svenge Ijsbeer » *hiccups*  Where've you been, boy?

Caiaphas » Hello, Svenge...I'm back!



. . . [cut to Svenge's Bar & Grill ]

Shadow » *wakes at the sound of the explosions; thinks: Son of a Biznatch! I did not expect the Baron to move this quickly OR use those damn aliens...I hope my master can handle things by himself. I'll need to stay here and backup the wards should they fail...the wards flare into visibility as Shadow adds her strength to them; thinks: May as well resume my normal form too. With a sound like a haunted scream, Shadow ceases to be an Aussie Shepherd, growing several times her size with wicked fangs...looking more like a primordial wolf than any dog*

judeparish » DAMN...NUKES ARE IN THE BAR!! Oh hells bells, always when people are sleeping. The wards are holding in my little section of the sewers though. Bastards... *sighs* ...I guess there's no other choice then.  *grabs his mismatched pair of fighting gloves, the spear, and enchanted hide longcoat*  Let's dance robot boy. *walks from his flat, leaving the heavy wards; a heavy electric aura surrounds him as he exits the scene stalking his prey*

Caiaphas » *laughs robotically as he drags a massive bag filled with varklings off into the distance*

Caiaphas » DEATH TO MARYSVILLE!  *fires begin erupting all over the town*  I AM THE HARBINGER OF DARKNESS! BOW BEFORE YOUR NEW LORD THE BARON AND HIS PRINCE OF EVIL HROTHGAR!  *explosions rock the towns neighboring Marysville, with particular attention paid to Sequim*

Strangely Familiar » *snort* *chortle* *hack*  Clear the sewers, will you?  *begins pushing buttons on a console*  THIS will keep you busy, fools! FEEL MY WRATH!

judeparish » Jude, I've made an offer of amnesty to the Baron, at least from my organization, if he withdraws support for the Tuskers. We'll have to wait to see what he says, but if he agrees, we MIGHT be able to clear this round of Tuskers out of the sewers and the town overall. We can only wait and see.

7.22.05 . . .

Jude » Svenge, no...I haven't seen him. And now Edna May's run off looking for him. I'm going to go back to DZ and regroup with Bunny, Dink, Ernie and the others. We'll find him...one way or another.  *exits back to DZ*

Edna May » Nooooo!!! Daniel! Daniel!!!  *runs into the dark searching for Daniel*

Svenge Ijsbeer » Ladies and gentlemen...Daniel is missing. We haven't seen him in a few days, and have been sending search parties out. Has anyone seen him?

Jude » Hmmm....we'll have to check it out together. Come to the feast tonight at DunkelZaubern and we'll talk strategy. Hopefully Daniel will be there.

Judeparish » Jude, it appears the section Jim wandered into is outside Shadow's and my normal haunt...the smell near my flat is non-existant. But I'm not surprised the Tuskers have hidden out on the far end of the sewers...it's near that area I said looked very non-sewer-like when I first explored. I never had a chance to dig around the area, and can only hope nothing too dangerous is hidden there.

7.20.05 . . .

Jude » Both, love...both...

Heiny Fouquette » *spots Millicent spotting the banner, grins while he scratches an armpit* .....and Heiny makes two..... *yaks up a hairball, snickering as he trails Millicent*

Millicent Cowslip-Rundle » *squints at the mouse's banner*  They're back... *growls* ...yes. Yes. I shall attend. Oh yes, I shall.  *exits cackling while shaking her head yes, then no, then yes, repeatedly*

Jude » *before exiting, she hears an evil cackle echo off the damp walls, followed by much snorting and coughing*  Beksoadresse...time for a war council.  *exits to street, carries Jim to DZ*

Jude » *peers down into manhole, smells the faint aroma of fishguts, frowns*  Bekosadresse...I'd know that smell anywhere. Jim? Hey, Reverend! Helloooooo...??  *sighs, envisioning Jim's inebriated carcass lying in a dark corner* ...better sweep the area... *drops into manhole; waits until eyes adjust to the dark, then edges forward; wending her way east, the rancid smell of rotten fish grows stronger the further she moves into the system*  Ack! How does JudeP stand this stench? Or perhaps it's only recently gotten this bad. Or maybe his magicks act as a barrier to the smell...and I'm talking to myself. Not a good sign.  *stops talking; moves deeper into the sewers; the smell is overwhelming when she finally spots Jim's unconscious body beside a waterway; she bends over him, whispers*  Jim? Can you hear me?  *he's ashen; his breathing is shallow*  Come on, Jim...time to go home.  *pulls him up and slings him over her shoulder; makes her way out of the system*

Jude » *shakes head*  Someone should sit on that woman... *exits to look for Rev Jim in the sewer system*

Edna May » *smiles remembering the platform room behind DZ; strokes ring of invisibility in her pocket*  Indeed we will! Meanwhile, I think I'll see if Daniel is up for another deathmatch... *murmers* ...and maybe a wee side excursion while everyone is watching the movies... *exits to find Daniel*

Jude » *sees Ernie floating above Marysville with banner; waves yelling*  We'll be there!!!

Ernie » *floats above hot tub, trailing banner*  BIG DINNER AT DUNKELZAUBERN TOMORROW NIGHT. ALL INVITED. BUNNY'S COOKING! NOT TO BE MISSED!

7.19.05 . . .

Jude » Both, love...both...

Edna May » *grins*  Svenge or the chicken?

Jude » *samples some of Svenge's Kung Pao Chicken while he's drifting off*  Mmmm, hot stuff.

Edna May » *climbs into the hottub, leans back with a sigh*  'Evening Jude, Svenge...lovely sunset...  *sips a chilled Bass Ale*

Jude » *slips into the hot tub with Svenge and a cool Bass Ale* ...love the jacuzzi effect, big guy... *leans back with a smile; whispers to the tagboard gods* ...thank you!

Svenge Ijsbeer » *plops down in the hot tub with a Bass Ale and a carton of Kung Pao Chicken*  Ahhh.....can life get any better?  *leans back, bubbles float up*  'scuse me.

Jude » Yeah, JudeP...blogdrive has been experiencing a severe case of tagboard tourettes.  *gnashes teeth*  Makes playing next to impossible.

Judeparish » Heh, my blog isn't coming up at the moment. Edna and Dan can wade thru the blood. The Tuskers are still a big ?? since I'm not sure that my magick can do anything to them. And with all my items I fight with being enchanted in some way or the other, it could heal them rather than hurt them.

7.18.05 . . .

Jude » JudeP...I tracked Jim to one of the manholes in your area, but must've been a tad plastered as I kept double tagging. I'll go after him first thing tomorrow. I'll look for you too...think we need to confer re "big-tusked-things that go  *snort*  in the night." Edna smells a new battle brewing, and after LA—er Antarctica—she's looking for some blood.

Jude » Hallie...yes indeed. Marysville is nothing if not vintage...altho' vintage what has yet to be determined.

Hallie » Wow, this is a nice blog!!! It looks so vintage. Does that make sense? Maybe it's the colors and background...great!

Judeparish » Jude? Edna? You really are back? Thank you, Provider, for small miracles. I haven't gotten an answer back from Svenge, so don't know if my magick will work on those Tuskers. Check my blog for more. At least Shadow is pretty convinced it's the tuskers. It's been troubling with Dan getting strange signals and the Reverend falling drunk down manholes.

Edna May » *eyes narrow as she sees SF's signature; feels her hand twitch towards her chakram as a slow smile spreads across her face*  Daniel, dear...it's slaying time again.

Jude » *grins at SF, sighs happily*  It's good to be home.

Strangely Familiar » *snarl*  So...you think that coming back before I was ready would stop me, do you?!?!? Hah! Await, pathetic humans! AWAIT THE COMING OF THE ENDLESS NIGHT!  *cough*  *hack*  *snort*

7.17.05 . . .

Jude » Ram? It's magic...and I'm really an undercover FBI agent. We have a file on you. A big, big, very big file.

Ram » hey how does that 'look into reality and deny' thing get my name and blog address? HMMMMM. HMM. Interesting. Actually not. But...wait. Who am I kidding? It's interesting. I wanna ask how you did it, but somehow I have this feeling you're going to make it sound all too simple, and then I'll feel stupid. So no no. But yeah, interesting.

7.16.05 . . .